1. Sati Savitri Aunty: Dear Aunty, I know your undying love for pancake, whorish red lipstick and the 120 Kg Swarosky crystal studded nine yards but please buy a pair of pyjamas and wear them when you go to sleep.
2.Facing the mother in law's wrath: Oh please! Who listens to all the "Kulta kamini main tera khoon pee jaungi" crap from the Mom in law all the time?! Get a life woman! Go take Kravmaga classes and beat the crap out of her. And who asked you to marry the son of a bitch in the first place?
3. Show some happiness: Why is there a need to have a serpentine Vamp (Background music included) always ready to kiss the protagonists with her diabolical fangs? Give her a break from all the ostentatious make up and send her to a rehab. We like happy families.
4. Rebirths: Raaz pichle janam ka was the only show which could pull off the concept of hypnotising non-celebrities and making us buy their bullshity past life stories but Savitri Aunty, why cant your husband stop rebirthing? Plastic surgeries are not for the middle class, just for you to know.
5. Idol worship: a) Why do you need wannabes who want to show more skin than Payal Rohatgi?
b) Why should contestants dance and stare into each other to display "chemistry" while singing duets?
c) Why should people vote for these strangers? Well, at least, the voting rate is high somewhere.
6. 'Spit'villa: We neither like muscular, angutha chaap dorks nor the desi imitations of blond bimbos mixed with a variety of colorful expletives.
Honestly, Transgender beauty pageants would make a better reality than that.
7. We-will-give-you-every-shitty-detail news channels: We dont want to know the color of Sania Mirza's nail paint when she was getting married or an interview with the barber who gave Shoaib a clean shaven look or the number of dieticians his ex-wife visited or the people who tried to grope "Sania Bhabhi" in Pakistan. I thought only NDTV imagine had taken the theka to arrange Swayamwars.
8. Talking of Swayamwars, I had a series of nightmares after accidently watching the coy, sugar coated Rakhi Sawant gyrating to Tujhme rab dikhta hai. Rahul Mahajan's laughter was equally
torturous.
9. The Great Indian Comedies: I shudder each time I hear those sudden fake bouts of laughter for jokes which deserve nothing more than a straight face. And the next time I see this certain person doing mimicry, Ill go into Coma.
10. Celebrity Dance shows: Saroj Khan's seeti or her beautifully accented Engliss doesnt make the TRP-o-meter rise anymore. And tell me what's worser than watching cricketers like Baichung Bhutia doing cha cha cha? Probably Mir ranjan Negi doing the same. Oh wait! Baichung plays football.
2.Facing the mother in law's wrath: Oh please! Who listens to all the "Kulta kamini main tera khoon pee jaungi" crap from the Mom in law all the time?! Get a life woman! Go take Kravmaga classes and beat the crap out of her. And who asked you to marry the son of a bitch in the first place?
3. Show some happiness: Why is there a need to have a serpentine Vamp (Background music included) always ready to kiss the protagonists with her diabolical fangs? Give her a break from all the ostentatious make up and send her to a rehab. We like happy families.
4. Rebirths: Raaz pichle janam ka was the only show which could pull off the concept of hypnotising non-celebrities and making us buy their bullshity past life stories but Savitri Aunty, why cant your husband stop rebirthing? Plastic surgeries are not for the middle class, just for you to know.
5. Idol worship: a) Why do you need wannabes who want to show more skin than Payal Rohatgi?
b) Why should contestants dance and stare into each other to display "chemistry" while singing duets?
c) Why should people vote for these strangers? Well, at least, the voting rate is high somewhere.
6. 'Spit'villa: We neither like muscular, angutha chaap dorks nor the desi imitations of blond bimbos mixed with a variety of colorful expletives.
Honestly, Transgender beauty pageants would make a better reality than that.
7. We-will-give-you-every-shitty-detail news channels: We dont want to know the color of Sania Mirza's nail paint when she was getting married or an interview with the barber who gave Shoaib a clean shaven look or the number of dieticians his ex-wife visited or the people who tried to grope "Sania Bhabhi" in Pakistan. I thought only NDTV imagine had taken the theka to arrange Swayamwars.
8. Talking of Swayamwars, I had a series of nightmares after accidently watching the coy, sugar coated Rakhi Sawant gyrating to Tujhme rab dikhta hai. Rahul Mahajan's laughter was equally
torturous.
9. The Great Indian Comedies: I shudder each time I hear those sudden fake bouts of laughter for jokes which deserve nothing more than a straight face. And the next time I see this certain person doing mimicry, Ill go into Coma.
10. Celebrity Dance shows: Saroj Khan's seeti or her beautifully accented Engliss doesnt make the TRP-o-meter rise anymore. And tell me what's worser than watching cricketers like Baichung Bhutia doing cha cha cha? Probably Mir ranjan Negi doing the same. Oh wait! Baichung plays football.
